Know The Red Flags Of A Conniving Online Con Artist

He talks about falling in love way too soon.

Red Flags Of A Con ArtistInternet dating is a legitimate way to find a romantic partner without the stigma it once had. However, this cyber playground provides anonymity for the players, con-artists and cheating husbands. Online men (and women) can easily conceal his identity by creating a fake profile, setting up a secret email address, have a throw-away cell phone and if necessary a P.O. box.

Let’s talk about the sweetheart scam:

These men come strong in the beginning. They will have plenty of time for you with numerous, long phone calls, emails and chats. They will tell you they never fell in love so fast with a woman and that no one understands him like you do and he’ll say things like you are a “God send” and he wants take care of you.

These scammers are an expert at detecting the needy, lonely and naive woman. He will listen carefully to you, size you up and know just what to say to steal your heart. To reel you in he will tell you of his dreams and of his past hurts. Many times he will tell you he once "had it all" but lost it so you will feel sorry for him, most times blaming an ex-wife or girlfriend. Or he will have an unexpected illness, hospital visit or personal emergency setting you up for a loan he never intends to pay back.

Here are the red flags of a relationship scam artist:

Be leery of a whirlwind romance.
Ask yourself the following questions:
Do they talk about sex too soon or do they want you to get a web cam?
Are they evasive to the way they answer your questions?
Do they ask too many questions about your financial status or do they reveal theirs quickly?
Do they constantly have excuses for everything?
Are they taking too long to meet you in person?
Have they said “I am relocating to an area near you”?

More red flags, especially for a married man:

Married men are more likely to initiate the first contact.
Ask yourself the following questions:
Are they not willing to trade photos or do they send only one?
(His online photo may not be his.)
Does he not post a picture of himself online, or he posts a picture that is very dark or blurry?
(He doesn’t want anyone to recognize him.)
Do you only get a cell phone number because they claim to have no home phone?
Are you able to reach them by phone at night and weekends?
Do you try and call, but constantly are forced to leave a voice?
(An indication that he has a girlfriend, wife or family and it is inconvenient to talk.)
Does he say that he travels a lot and that’s why you can’t reach him?
Are his calls and response back to you very irregular or at set times?
Will he not share his last name with you?
(Or he gives you a phony name so you can’t Google him or research his identity.)
Is he secretive about where he lives?
Do you never get the chance to meet his friends or family?

Protect yourself:

Check-out an online man through public records, research websites and connections.

Save all emails or chat logs, and pay very close attention to details. You may pick up on discrepancies of things they have told you.

Arrange your first meeting in a public place like a coffee shop, book store or restaurant, and don’t have him pick up or accept a lift home until you know the person well.

Ask to see his driver’s license. If he balks, he’s probably not who he says he is.

Most importantly, always trust your gut instincts; if you feel suspicious or uncomfortable about a man, it's your intuition trying to warn you that a man is "bad news."


Are you influenced by a man’s good looks, flattering words and success?
Do you have a history of dating and falling love with the wrong man?
Have you recently broken up with an abusive man?

Learn the early warning signs of anti-social personalities in:

Never Date a Dead Animal:
The Red Flags of Losers, Abusers, Cheaters and Con-Artists

By Nancy Nichols

Purchase book here!

For more insight into today’s internet dating rules, sign up for Know-It-All Nancy’s newsletter here.