Your brain accepts beneficial mental pictures as your new reality.
You are not what happened to you in the past. You are what you choose to become today.
Eckard Tolle said, The voice in your head is not who you are.
Most of our internal programming is the result of how we grew up. Our parents, caretakers, teachers, and authority figures form our core beliefs about ourselves. In school our classmates and friends affect our opinions of ourselves. Later in life, a boyfriend or a husband contributes to our mindset.
If the people in our past were disapproving, hyper-critical, unsupportive, neglectful or abusive, they contaminated your belief system causing you to form false and unfavorable images about yourself. These derogative images manifest as repetitive thought patterns that affect your behavior, damage your self-worth and impair your ability to maintain healthy relationships.
Your high school negative inner voice told you: You’re stupid. You’re plain-looking. Your personality is annoying and boring. Your hair is frizzy, your teeth are crooked and your clothes are an embarrassment. The popular girls don’t want to be your friend and the guys don’t want to date you.
Your adult critical inner voice tells you: You’re unattractive, incompetent and unimportant, the people at work don’t like you and you don’t fit in social situations. You’re unlovable, undeserving and unworthy of a boyfriend who will love and respect you.
Sadly, you believe this negative self-talk and you act accordingly. You’re afraid to ask your boss for a raise. You’re afraid to stand up to your controlling, self-serving girlfriend. You sleep with a man because you’re afraid to say “no.” You date men who non-committal and emotionally unavailable. You commit to abusive men and you’re afraid to leave him because your inner critic tells you: No man will want you because you’re undesirable, dim-witted and you have no control over your circumstances.
Girlfriend, who put this garbage in your head?!? It certainly wasn’t your Maker!
Changing the negative into the positive eliminates the negative.
If you want to buy a nicer house, begin looking at home for sale, start pack unnecessary belongings and stage your house for the market. Months later, when you least expect the right house for you will appear.
If you need to go back to school to earn a degree so you can land a higher paying job, look at the classes available at your local college and talk to a guidance counselor. Your brain will begin to tell you, Girl, you can do this!
If you need to exercise, post snapshots of you at your ideal weight, lay out your exercise clothes and envision you power walking or running. Your brain will crave exercise instead of a second cup of morning coffee or evening wine.
A passionate, can-do mindset will displace stinking thinking.
Starting thinking and doing the things that stimulate and reprogram your brain to focus on the things you want, instead of dwelling on the things you don’t have. Your Higher Power will feel your ardor and longings and respond accordingly.
Do yourself an immense service and STOP allowing the negative, miserable thoughts and actions of others dictate the quality of your life and—LET IT GO!
You were designed with a unique personality, innate talents and special gifts. Your life is intended to have purpose and meaning. You are here on earth to bless and benefit the people who truly know you and appreciate you, value you and love you for the unique and special person you are. Everyone else is not worthy of your time, energy and devotion.
Now, send yourself an email to remind you of the following truths:
- You are not the hyper-criticisms of your mom or your father.
- You are not the insecure teenager whom her classmates rejected, who didn’t make the cheerleader squad or basketball team, or got blackballed from a sorority.
- You are not the shame-based woman who slept with a string of men searching for a man’s love and acceptance.
- You are not the little girl whose father abandoned or abused her, causing you to crave a father’s love and validation.
- You are not the little girl who was repeatedly molested by your father, uncle, or male family member.
- You are not the unkind words of your self-absorbed girlfriend, co-worker or boss.
- You are not the woman who drinks or does drugs to numb your emotional pain.
- You are not the demeaning put-down remarks of your abusive boyfriend or husband.
- You are NOT a frikkin doormat!
You DO NOT have to live the rest of your life absorbing and believing the condescending, self-absorbed, unkind thoughts of others.
You may also enjoying reading How To Be Your Authentic Self And TRULY Connect To Others.
Does your negative self-talk hack away at your self-worth? Based on true events, my book God, Please Fix Me! can help you dispel the harmful, false beliefs you have about yourself.
God, Please Fix Me! Trilogy A Breakthrough in Self-Esteem, Relationship Understanding and Personal Healing for Women
by Nancy Nichols
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