You’ve had several dates with a man you really like and you wonder: should you give him a Santa gift?
Here's the conundrum: You just starting dating a guy and you don't want to appear anxious or presumptuous about your relationship by giving him a Christmas gift - but you don't want to show up empty-handed on your upcoming date should he present you with a gift.
Oh, the delimma! What should you do?
Keep in mind that a man is probably wondering the same thing: should he give you a gift? He doesn’t want to appear too eager. He doesn’t want to buy anything expensive because he doesn’t want you to read too much into the new relationship, but he worries if he gives you something small you'll think he’s cheap. He may also be afraid to show up empty-handed should you give him a gift.
First, give from the heart. Don't have expectations of whether or not he will give you a gift. Give a modest gift that says, “I-like-you-and-I-look-forward-to-getting-to-know-you-better."
Here are 7 thoughtful and appropriate gifts:
- Give a gift that’s an inside joke. I dated a guy who said he hated Christmas. A coffee cup is horrible gift but I found one at Starbucks that said BAH HUMBUG on it. He got a kick out of it!
- Feed his caffeine addiction with a Starbucks gift certificate.
- Give him a DVD of a TV show or a movie that he mentioned he wants to watch.
- Buy him tickets to a movie or a play, but only if the event is a week or two away. Otherwise he’ll think you’re trying to hog-tie him into a relationship.
- He'll love a batch of homemade cookies, just don't complain when he puts on a couple of pounds.
- Does he like to cook? Get him a cool cooking gadget or give him a live-potted Rosemary plant decorated with red ribbons. When he pinches Rosemary he’ll think of you.
- Give him a fun CD mix of Christmas music. Hopefully your mix will become a holiday tradition. Otherwise, after you guys split — and he’s sitting on his sofa with his arm wrapped around his new honeybun and he pops your CD into his stereo to set the mood — he’ll think of you.
Here are 7 things you definitely SHOULDN'T give your brand-new boyfriend.
- Don't give him a shirt. The same goes for a tie or socks: It's personal and BORING!
- Don’t give him jewelry. Cha-ching! Jewelry screams I'm desperate. I’m needy!
- Don’t give him tickets to a romantic get-away weekend. It's too soon.
- Don’t give him a scrapbook of your time spent together.
- Don’t knit him a scarf or hat. You’re a modern gal—not his grandma.
- Don’t give him your ring size!
- And the no 1. Gift to NOT give a brand-new boyfriend: A framed photo of yourself. It howls that you want to be his “one and only.”
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God, Please Fix Me! Trilogy
A Breakthrough in Self-Esteem, Relationship Understanding and Personal Healing for Women
by Nancy Nichols
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